Why Church?  Post three.

I just received new input to my question as to the why or why not of church attendance.  I am still trying to digest it but it does point to the second-most reason for attending church or, conversely why they don’t. Being accepted as an individual.

I confess that all this stuff is based upon a very imprecise methodology, but never-the-less this strong current seems to push its way through the seemingly calm waters of church attendance.  There is an unspoken expectation of conformity within the church. There are unspoken guidelines that are placed upon everyone that attends.  If the leader of worship asks everyone to stand, it is expected that all will stand, even if it causes pain.  If there is a special offering for whatever is the cause of the day, there is an expectation that all will give.  If the unstated theology of the church states you will vote and vote a specific way, there is an expectation that you will.  Every church seems to have a set of rules that must be conformed to.  I have seen theological statements made on literally hundreds of church websites that spell out to the last detail of who is God and what He expects.  There is little space for individuality. It is conformity or nothing.  There is no room for being unique.  As one respondent wrote, “People are messy.” The attainment of perfection as defined by the church crowd is not attainable.  It is a moving target.  One person expects one behavior and another expects something different.  And when one person steps out of line, pressure is applied to bring them back into conformity.

The very expectation of conformity squeezes out the individual.  This expectation of conformity also unleashes comparison, judgment, and hypocrisy.  It leaves little room for me to live, breath, or to be my own person.  When I try to be the unique me, my acceptance in the church is in jeopardy.  Sure, the church is full of unique people, but there is a constant pressure to conform to the perfect image of what a Christian should be.  Or at least what the current envisionment of what a Christian should be.

In my research, this is often characterized as “the church is a bunch of hypocrites.”  Hypocrites because of this internal expectation of conformity is not even held to by those who expect it in everyone else.

People who are accepted in their individuality like church.  They are valued for their uniqueness. People what to be what God has made them, not what the expectations of others would have them be.  There is no predetermined mold for what we should be.  A church that accepts the way we are and all our idiosyncrasies, warts and all, is the church where you are welcome and is a joy to attend.